unrelated short stories, brief observations and anecdotes detailing multiple events that I was party to, witnessed, read in police reports or heard about mostly during my nearly thirty-seven years of service in the Massachusetts court system at the Attleboro District Court, then as Clerk-Magistrate of the Wrentham District Court. I got to know many hardworking, honest court employees, attorneys and police officers who did their best every day to fulfill the valid expectations of those noble professions. There are also stories included that have nothing to do with the courts that I hope you will find interesting or humorous. My third grade Nun, Sister Mary Alice would gasp in disbelief if she knew that I am sometimes being introduced as an author! The book is divided into twelve chapters. I have tried to focus on positive aspects and included stories where it seemed to make the most sense, but many could have been listed in more than one chapter. In general, after a determination of culpability I would quite often give people a break on speeding tickets and other nonviolent offenses, but usually not on serious cases, especially where victims had been physically harmed. I have tried to remember funny aspects of criminal and civil matters even when the humor was generated from a serious case. The recognition of humor should not be taken to be disrespectful to victims of crime as making victims whole was always my main objective. As long as feelings aren't hurt - laughter is the best medicine! Whenever a judge or clerk-magistrate is mentioned on these pages I have also included the appointing authority. This is not intended to define judicial philosophy, political alignment or any other consequential matter. I just believe that identification with the appointing Governor becomes an integral part of the clerk-magistrate or judge's life. I heard testimony from victims, plaintiffs, defendants, respondents, uniformed police officers, detectives and other witnesses while hearing small claims, civil motor vehicle infractions, arrest & search warrant requests & criminal show cause hearings. Most people were truthful, but many were not. When it came to telling a lie, some of our litigants made George Santos look like George Washington! A Cape Cod attorney smiled and told me one time that it seems as though I make my living listening to people lie to me. We both had a good laugh about such a unique job description!