But I always fell back on what felt normal comfortable, which was abusive relationship after abusive relationship. Many dark years, excruciating beatings, and five children later, I discovered that the only way to overcome the circumstances surrounding me was to break the cycle that I'd maintained for so long.
My recovery became my journey. It was difficult to recover while I continued the same patterns in my life. I had to go back to the very beginning and unpack the initial trauma and how it continued to affect me for so long. After months in individual therapy dealing with the current and most obvious abusive relationships in my life, I finally paused long enough to address the deepest and most painful scar I carried.